How To Write A Constructive Scout Review

Listen!

Before you can begin writing a constructive review, you need to listen! There is no point writing about the problematic lead guitar if the track is a classical composition with no guitars in earshot!

Be aware!!  If it is obvious from the review submitted, that you have not listened to the track in question, the artist may report you to Slicethepie.  Should Slicethepie agree that the review is not constructive, you could be suspended and lose your scout earnings.

It’s Not OK

Probably the most unconstructive word you can use in your review is ‘OK’.  If you describe something as being ‘OK’, you might as well have said nothing.  ’OK’ means acceptable or passable.

It’s the ’shoulder shrug’ of descriptive words.  It conveys neither like nor dislike and shows a lazy and thoughtless approach to your review.  DO NOT USE! Sitting on the fence doesn’t help the artist.

Production Quality

There is a lot of debate as to whether production quality should be mentioned in a review.  After all, the £15k financing is supposed to pay for the track to be professionally recorded, mixed and mastered.   If the recording quality is exceptionally substandard, don’t be afraid to mention this.  Distortion, noise, static and peaking levels are unforgivable and will naturally effect any review/score given.  It is best to only mention other production issues if you have experience in production and are able to not only point out problems, but provide advice as to how the artist could overcome any such issues.

“This track would sound better recorded in a professional studio” – a very unhelpful comment.

“A pop shield or post production Deesser might help in eliminating the excess vocal sibilance” - Helpful

In conclusion, it is best to mention production quality in your review, only if you know something about it and can provide useful advice to the artist.

Review Length

God may have created the world in 7 days, but trust us on this; you cannot write a constructive review in 7 words. Needless to say, the ScoutPlayer’s ‘Autobotic Scout Slapper’ will pick up on overly short reviews and throw them back at you to redo.  Whilst it is possible to submit reviews comprising of just a couple of sentences, we would recommend writing 3-5 sentences (approx 50-100 words)  in order to deliver a constructive review to the artist.  Remembers, at least one sentence could be written for each of the sections highlighted on this page.  writing 3-5 sentences is very easy if you adopt a planned and structured method.

Adjectives

Adjectives – or simply ‘descriptive words’, should form the basis for your review.  If you mention anything, be sure to describe it. With so many adjectives in the English dictionary, a clever use of descriptive words can ensure your reviews are not too similar.

“I liked the drums” – lacks description.

“I liked the thunderous and heavy drums, especially the snappy and crisp snare” – a little more description and detail provides the artist with a more constructive overview.

For inspiration, be sure to consult an online Thesaurus!!

Be Specific

A general comment like “I didn’t like the vocalist” only tells the artist that you didn’t like the vocalist.  In order to convey your opinion and be constructive, explain why!

“I didn’t like the vocalist because she had difficulty keeping in key” is a  much more constructive statement.  It is worth noting the track time should anything noteworthy occur in the track.  In doing so, highly constructive statements can be given such as

“I didn’t like the artist because she had difficulty keeping in key, especially at 1.22 and 1.56 in the track”

Notice how we have already used 20 words just explaining one aspect of a vocal?

Timing

Timing issues in a track are always worth pointing out.  If the track has groove or the instruments are ‘tight’, let the artist know.  Similary, if the track is all over the place, or one of the instruments is having difficulty keeping in time, it is worth highlighting.

Sounds Like?

Do tell an artist if they remind you of someone.  It is fine to state that an artist sounds like a second rate ‘Eminem’ (for example). However, it is unacceptable to slate the artist for trying to sound like Eminem.  Similary, if the artist has a unique sound, it is worth commenting on this.

Commercial Viability

A very controversial topic.  The whole scout process is set up to put forward the most commercially viable tracks.  The problem is, what is commercially viable? Is it what is played on the mainstream media? Remember, if a track is at the top of it’s game, within a niche genre, it too could do well amongst it’s fan base.  Negative reviews/scores given to genres that are not necessarily played on BBC Radio 1 show genre bias and narrow vision.  It is best to base your review in context with the genre at hand.  If you are reviewing a classical film score (for example), try to base any comments on it’s commercial viability around it’s intended market.  If in doubt, it is easier to avoid the topic.

How Do You Feel?

Music is a universal language.  It speaks to us on many levels and can move us in ways other forms of communication cannot.  Artists create music in order to invoke a response in the listener and  are therefore very eager to hear what response (if any) their music has had on you.  Perhaps the track made you feel happy, sad, annoyed, irritated, bored, elated or calm?  Perhaps there was something in particular in the track that caused this?

“The vocal tone was irritating, totally at odds with the soothing piano melody”

The Classic Sh*t Sandwich

If a track is bad….really bad; try to wrap the bad in between some positive remarks.  Not only does this balance your review, the artist is more likely to view your negative remarks as constructive rather than plain nasty.

“The intro started off well with an imaginative array of sounds.  What followed can only be described as a train wreck as the cringeworthy vocal clashed with the detuned guitar that sounded like a dying cat. On a positive note, the drums were punchy and powerful.”

Justify Your Score

If your score is at odds with the review submitted, this will only serve to confuse the artist.  Whilst it would be ideal for all scores to reflect the review given, the review and score are two seperate entities.  The review forms your personal opinion of the track.  The score (assuming you play by the slicethepie rules) is a judgement of how you feel everyone else will score the track.  It is quite possible that you may personally love a track, but give it an average score to maintain your accuracy/star rating.  If for any reason you feel the need to give a score that does not reflect the review given, be sure to include the reason for this in your review.

Fit For Purpose?

Does the track have a particular purpose? Does it fall short or exceed this purpose?  For example, a dance track that has a thumping 4×4 kickdrum is created to move dancefloors.  Stating that such a track failed to invoke an ambient and tranquil atmosphere shows a disregard to the genre and style the artist creates.  Similarly, criticising the lack of distorted vocals, wiki wik scratching or a 909 kick in a piece of classical music is destined to fall on deaf ears.  Such statements do not help artists, and merely show up the genre bias of the scout.  It is always best to review genres you are comfortable with and have an understanding of.

Lyrics

A track’s lyrical content provides ample to write about! How were the lyrics delivered? What was your opinion on the subject matter? Were they coherant, audible, clear, descriptive, clever or simplistic?  Were the lyrics poetic, gritty, dark or humourous? Were they easy to follow? Did they compliment the track? Were they catchy?

Give Constructive Advice

Scouts may be tempted to give advice to an artist in their review.  Whilst there is nothing wrong with this, be careful how you phrase that advice.  It is sometimes better to offer a ‘suggestion’ than to provide an opinion under the guise of fact.

“If you sped the track up, it would sound better” - offers your biased opinion.

“It may be worth considering increasing the tempo, which may add to the tracks energy, which was lacking for me” - notice how this comes across as a helpful suggestion!

Honesty Is The Best Policy

If you hate a track, apart from adopting the ‘sh*t sandwich’ technique, don’t try to soften the blow.  Say it as it is! That said, do so in a polite and respectful manner.  There is nothing wrong with telling an artist you hated their music (as long as you explain why!).  Similarly, if you really loved a track,  let the artist know.  Remember – conveying your overall feeling towards a track is a great way of concluding your review.

F5

There will be genres you despise or do not wish to scout.  If you come across a track you do not wish to review, simply press F5 and move onto the next one.  If you cannot listen to a track objectively, you are not doing the artist any favours in reviewing their track.  Remember – reviewing tracks you know nothing about, or dislike, could impact your scout rating.

Don’t State The Obvious

“This song is a song” – Not helpful!!

“Initially, there were some drums, followed by a rock guitar, accompanied  by a female vocalist” – This is neither helpful or constructive.  The artist is primarily interested in your opinion, not a running commentary of their track.  It’s the artist’s track after all…..they already know what happens! Only mention a track event if you plan to talk about it.  Filling out a review with unnecessary ‘padding’ is just lazy, and very unhelpful.

Stand By Your Review

Whilst the reviews are submitted anonomously, some scouts are happy to sign off their reviews with their Slicethepie username.  It is a voluntary gesture, but can add weight to your review.